Saturday, October 12, 2013

The need for a "Cause"

I have noticed something about people.  We need to be needed.  We need to feel important.  And very often, we need a cause.  This is particularly true when we run up against something and unexpected diagnosis of Down syndrome.  We unconsciously feel the need to prove to the world, our friends, our families....ourselves...that we are ok with this.  So we take up our banner and fight for, for, wait...what are we fighting for?  Acceptance?  Equality?  Fairness?  Justice?  All good things to be sure, but we don't need to make them our cause and spend all of our focus and energy on ensuring that the whole world line up and behave properly.  News flash.  That's not going to happen.  The world is a horribly unfair place.  Now I'm not saying don't stand up for right and for your child.  But, well, let me put it this way,  this girl
is my cause.  I focus on her.  Helping her grow into a capable, strong woman.  And guess what...when I accomplish that...she will change the world's view of her all by herself.  I don't need to jump up on a soapbox and tell the world how to treat her (though treat her badly and you don't want to see Mama bear!),  I need to surround her with loving, caring people who will always be there for her no matter what the rest of the world does.  Changing hearts and minds through actions one at a time will spread.  And see when I don't cover up my fears with a "cause" then I am modeling what I want others to see...Reagan is a gift just the way she is.